The 50/50 Friendship Split: Loyalty vs. Honesty

What quality do you value most in a friend?

My brain immediately splits into two camps: honesty vs. loyalty. And honestly? I’m still torn. It’s a 50/50 split for me, and I’ll tell you why.

Let’s start with honesty. I respect the hell out of someone who can look me in the eye and just tell me the truth—no sugarcoating, no games. Life’s too short for guesswork. If I messed up, tell me. If my breath smells like a dead raccoon, I’d rather hear it from a friend than walk around offending the population. The best people in my life are the ones who’ll call me out when I need it—not to be mean, but because they care enough to say what others won’t.

But then there’s loyalty. The ride-or-die stuff. The kind of friend who shows up when it’s pouring rain and I’ve got a flat tire in the middle of nowhere. The one who’s got my back when I’m not even in the room. Loyalty is that unshakable trust—knowing someone’s not gonna flake when things get tough, or throw you under the bus when it’s convenient. It’s deep. It’s personal. And let’s be real, in a world full of fair-weather friends, loyalty feels rare—and insanely valuable.

So how do you choose between the two?

The honest truth (see what I did there?) is that I don’t think I can. Honesty without loyalty can feel cold—like someone who’s brutally honest but doesn’t stick around to help you deal with it. On the flip side, loyalty without honesty turns into blind devotion, and that’s a fast track to toxic territory. I don’t want someone who always agrees with me just because we’ve got history. I want someone who’ll tell me the truth, but still have my back while I work through it.

If I had to pick? Maybe I’d lean honesty by a hair. Because with real honesty, loyalty tends to follow. A friend who tells you the truth and still chooses to stick around—that’s someone solid. Someone you can build trust with, long term. But then again, I’ve had people be 100% honest and still bounce when things got inconvenient. So… yeah. Still 50/50.

I guess at the end of the day, I value a friend who balances both. Someone who tells it like it is, and stays in your corner. That’s the sweet spot. That’s rare. And if you’ve got someone like that in your life? Hold on tight.

And maybe buy them a beer. Just sayin’.